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Contests : Wergle Flomp Free Poetry Contest : Past Winners : 2006
We sought the best humor poems that have been submitted to "vanity contests" as a joke. These are contests that give the impression of being selective but are not. They praise poems indiscriminately, hoping to induce poets to buy their books, bowls and plaques.
Congratulations to our 2006 prizewinners Nicholas Moore, Jim Neill and Dakotah Burns, and to our five honorable mentions and ten finalists. Their poems were judged the best of the 1,061 entries we received. Cash prizes totaling $1,609 were awarded, and all prizewinners and honorable mentions received an official Winning Writers polo shirt.
Click the names below to view the winning entries and learn about the honorees. Read comments on the entries from contest judge Jendi
Reiter. Read the press release announcing the winning entries.
First Prize
Nicholas Moore
"How to Write a Poem"
Second Prize
Jim Neill
"Masculine Message from Damion McGraw"
Third Prize
Dakotah Burns
"Like a Snow Day"
Honorable Mentions
E.V. Noechel, "An Ode to Taste"
Chris Paul, "Gerry Sears"
Tammi Reynolds, "The Diet Song of J. Anna Prufroski"
Magenta St Germain, "Solitude"
Maggie May Schill, "Your Hands Do the Work of 10,000 Highly Trained Lesbian Jumping Beans"
Finalists
Steve Gottlieb, "Automotive Safety Survey"
Sarah Estes Graham, "War Is SO Bad: A Compendium of Truth"
Holly Kreger, Untitled ("Drainpipes: angrily grumbling on the edges of fear...")
Benjamin Taylor Lally, Untitled ("When the time comes along to count up the greats...")
Holly Martin, "Love Is Not All"
Gayle L. Porter, "The Crack Epidemic"
Charity Remington, "The Rebellion of Jane"
John Ryan, "Sonnet for My Roommate"
C.J. Van Gieson, "Take out"
Andrew Williams, "Hillbilly's Folly"
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