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Contests : Wergle Flomp Free Poetry Contest : Past Winners : 2007 : Ron Hayes
WHO WINS AT MONOPOLY: WALT WHITMAN OR EMILY DICKINSON?
Because she would not leave her rooms
for food from Mickey D's.
Nor would she likely seek to get
a gamepiece mailed for free
Miss Dickinson ne'er once did play,
enjoy, or even see
a board, a piece, an instant win
from Mac's "Monopoly".
But since Walt Whitman strolled about
with journalistic ease—
to SuperSize his Diet Coke
and fries whene'er he pleased,
Old Walt was free to play the game—
he did, and lo! he won!
And thus did Walt defeat the Em—
we know as Dickinson.
Sent as a joke to Poetry.com, this poem was a finalist in the 2007 Wergle Flomp humor poetry contest sponsored by Winning Writers.
About Ron Hayes
Ron Hayes teaches Learning Support English classes, coaches football, and writes poems at East High School in Erie, Pennsylvania. His poetry has appeared in print and online here and there. For the past two years he has been named the Staff Poet Laureate of the School District of the City of Erie. Not that anyone's noticed.
His poem was written in response to a bonus essay question on an exam in an undergraduate poetry class taught at Penn State Erie by the poet Alan Michael Parker. The bonus question itself appears as the title of the poem. Apologies to Miss Dickinson.
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