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Contests : Wergle Flomp Free Poetry Contest : Past Winners : 2008 : Justin Blackburn
UPON THE STEAMING SKY
In the steaming sky
Where Santa Clause pretends he is Jesus
The milky way hatches easter eggs in it's theory of God.
The Way To Get A Poetry Career Writing For Pretentious Magazines
Use beautiful language describing how you are a huge loser
And the only thing which can relate to you
Is an inanimate object your mother took from you as a child.
Comment on your long old life,
Talk about your inability to understand your sadness,
Compare it to wallpaper.
Say how it is you peeling off the walls,
Use some word like arrangement.
Write about the authors you respect,
Talk about how they were sad and lonely.
Talk about how they never got any money until they died.
As you write pretend to cry,
Say something about how maybe one day everything will be alright,
Throw something in there about a sunrise,
But then say for now everything is listless and ready to die.
Talk about some girl you never knew
Who you really wanted to talk to
But did not have the courage to do so,
Talk about how you still have no courage.
If you talk about nature,
Speak on it with confusion.
Talk about how you enjoy it,
But you are still afraid of the dark.
Most importantly pretentious poets want to read stuff about how they feel.
Pretentiously.
But do not look any further then the time you pooped your long johns
You had a great chance then to change the world
But instead you wasted all your money on a new pair of pants
And a new place to go to school
Love is like a chair firm and flexible,
My pride is worth more then a famous painter's masterpiece
And I realease my negative energy on white sheets of paper
So I want eat a lot of food at the buffet tonight.
Going to church is a real bummer.
Sent as a joke to Poetry.com, this poem was a finalist in the 2008 Wergle Flomp humor poetry contest sponsored by Winning Writers.
About Justin Blackburn
Justin Blackburn is the author of two books, Gifted Disabiltiies and It's Hard To Get There When You Are Already There. Currently is writing a book called Enjoy The Irresistible Present, he hopes it will help continue to raise the vibration of the human beings upon planet earth. Justin Blackburn believes we live in a perfect world, where you rule your own universe.
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